Iranian Sub Takes Osama bin-Laden’s Body July 24, 2011
The Washington Post broke the terrible news first with the following article.
The Washington Post
Where World News and National Security Intersect
Iranian Sub Takes Osama bin-Laden’s Body
By Joel Greenbaum, July 24, 6:22 PM
WASHINGTON D.C. – Today it was reported that unusual submarine activity was reported in and around the deep-sea burial site of Osama bin-Laden. Pentagon officials have been mum, but many have speculated that the body of terrorist Osama bin-Laden has been snatched from the ocean deep.
With not even a month in his cold wet grave bin-Laden seems to be now in the hands of the Iranian Revolutionary Guard. Reports are leaking out of the White House that it was one of Iran’s new subs commissioned last year.
It appears that the heavily reinforced body bag of bin-Laden was meant to be found by the Defense Department since it was dropped down to nearly eleven thousand feet with a GPS signaling device. Obviously, it seems that the Iranians have discovered the top-secret frequency used by the device and quickly snatched the body.
Further reports indicate that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad will be making a special announcement to the world from Tehran.
“At this point” said Vice President Biden, “we have nothing to say, sorry.”
Copyright #38629442 – The Washington Post
President Obama finished reading the article off the wire and promptly threw up. It landed everywhere, the desk, chair, rug and his new suit. It was embarrassing, since he was with a group of his trusted aids in the Oval Office. As he quickly headed for the side bathroom where Monica and Bill used to rendezvous this President was there for another reason - cleanup.
As he emerged brushing off chunks of beef and noodles Romanof he yelled “That God-damn Iranian is wrecking my party and I won’t stand for it.” Then he immediately belched up more remaining pieces of beef which caused his torso to buckle in a giant cramp that sent him back to the toilet where he nearly plunged his entire head into the commode.
Vice President Biden couldn’t understand why the President was blowing dinner since Michelle cooked it, a tradition in the Obama family, the dinner, not the throwing up, as the 840th day of Obama Presidency kept flushing.